Money Matters in Marriage

“Money is not worth fighting about.”
Image source: Keys to Happy Marriage
Ambie Bulos, spouse of the editor-in-chief of “Money Sense” magazine, underscored this in their “Money Sense Live! Family Finance 101” seminar organized by Learning Curve. Her husband, Heinz, pointed out that couples fight over money because they have different money personalities” (probably, the husband is a storer while the wife is a spender), they value money differently, “both parties [wanted] to take charge or one is clueless or not interested”, “both parties still live as if they’re single”, they have “difficulty trusting” each other and they are irresponsible.

The key is that the couples should see themselves as “one unit” as described in Genesis 2:24, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.” (NIV) For example, they may handle money unlike each other. But unity is not uniformity. Husband and wife just need to agree on their “money goals and plans”. They can still be one. 

Image source: N.I.F.T.Y. Christian
As to who’s in charge, the Bible is clear. “For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church… Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.” (Ephesians 5:23-24) The husband has the final say. “Everything” includes money matters. However, as to who should write the budget or hold the checkbook is something that the couple needs to concur. As Ambie explained, “Plan together for the future. Divide money tasks. Whoever is good at handling money should be in charge… Stick to your plan. Share sacrifices equally and enjoy privileges together… Sometimes things cannot be resolved. Agree to disagree. Find ways to compromise” (Ibid). 
Image source: Fabulously 40 & Beyond
Wisely handled, money can help the couple to trust each other. That’s why a joint-account is really encouraged. “Without it, wives may have a false sense of security, not knowing the state of the family’s finances, or husbands may feel that they work and work and spend for everything, not knowing where the money goes.” (Ibid) Yes, money is not worth fighting about. Marriage is. But money can be a weapon to fight for marriage.

My take? Money matters in marriage.


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